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A Letter To My 18 Year-Old-Self

Dear young, naive and Beautiful Bubu,

This has been a long time coming. It’s your ‘Thirty-somethingieth‘ birthday today, so what better way to mark it than give you some needed advice? (just in case you get a second chance in life to be my age again).

A lot has changed here, at least I know your lady lumps are not as perky as they used to. Now Listen, and listen real hard to some hard truth and facts. This will get you prepared for what’s to come.

Mama always told You, “Always be prayerful”. She told you too often, so much you thought it was more of a cliché and her tagline. Well, Life is sweet but could be hard sometimes. You are gonna take that advice and run with it.

I know you just got into the university and you are going to church meetings every other day. It takes you close to God but keeps you far from your goal grades. Babe, have Sense! Always strike a balance. Besides, school is for school.

Those cheese balls you kept chugging in, in school. Let’s just say with two (failed) gym subscriptions, epileptic jogging habit and serial dieting, you’ve still not gotten your body back. You see, it’s really hard losing these pounds. There’s a new diet they call ‘Keto’. No, not ‘ghetto’. Well, one thing I know your heart’s gotta be ghetto to sustain Keto.

If you know what God has in store for You, you would let go of all the fears, insecurities and just let God lead you. Just the way I advice you to let go of that Nokia 3310 you hold so dearly because the phones you have now, do about everything.

 

You said your world is crazy? Wait till you get to mine. There’s this big distraction now called Social media. It’s a crazy place. You laugh, cry and show all kinds of emotion there. We have the judge and jury in there too, slandering left, right, centre. People ain’t private anymore, they just let stuff out. Smh.(I bet you are wondering what smh is. It means ‘shaking my head’. You’d be seeing alot of social abbreviations as you grow). In this world now, Boys do boys, Girls do girls and in some part of the world its legal. Sad and unbelievable! Marijuana is now legal in some parts too. Being naked is the norm. People do very heavy makeup like Geishas. People don’t see eye to eye anymore because their faces are buried in those smart phones I talked about. Mad people don’t roam the streets anymore, they just dress up and call themselves Kaitlyn Jenner and Bobrisky. When you hear these names, flee!

Remember how you swore you wouldn’t date, how much more marry a man from your place? Honeychild, not only did you marry a man from your place, you can actually take a stroll down to his village from yours. Hahaha. The joke’s on You!….and you have two gorgeous kids together.

You have no business looking to date at 18. A wrong Relationship always rears its ugly head with time. It’s always love until it gets complicated. A man who is serious about marriage, gets it done without a fuss. No drama, No excuses. I’d advice you use your “singlehood” time for more profitable things, like building an app called Facebook. Trust me, if you do that, you’d be a billionaire.

Your favorite girl group, Spice girls, is now called old skool.*faints*.  I just can’t wrap my head around it but darling, they are now called ‘pop classics’ a.k.a old skool. There’s a new age of music I am still trying to understand. Good music dies when you get to 25. Whitney Houston dies, Michael Jackson dies. Even in Grey’s Anatomy, Dr Derek ‘McDreamy‘ dies eventually. I told you Shonda Rhimes could not be trusted.

Oh, NEPA rebranded to PHED….. but there’s still no constant power supply in Nigeria.

The Queen of England is still not dead and she’s still staying fresh. Prince Charles looks like he’s tired of waiting om the crown, so he’s looking older now.

You’ve not met Oprah yet(deep sigh)…but soon darling…soon!

Anyway, I wish I could tell you more but I do something they call ‘blogging’, where you are supposed to write interesting and (not-so-long) posts on the internet so people can read….so I have to stop here. Come to think of it, you dreaded  the thought of being my age but nothing’s changed that much. You’re  still gorgeous. So happy birthday to us, baby!

Ps. Apologies for the picture quality. Couldn’t get a hold of my pictures.

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16 Comments

  • Reply
    Amah
    July 11, 2017 at 3:31 pm

    Happy birthday bubu. I laughed because the letter was written to the girl I knew !

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 11, 2017 at 3:48 pm

      Hahahaha. Oh Dear! Memories, right!

  • Reply
    Ella
    July 11, 2017 at 5:27 pm

    Omg. I must write this to myself ASAP
    I’m cracked up !!! Well done Bubu

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 12, 2017 at 11:57 am

      Lol. Thanks dear

  • Reply
    Eno Tai
    July 11, 2017 at 5:40 pm

    How time flies. You’ve grown into such a beautiful lady and writer. This is a classic and please save it for your daughter’s. Just wonder how their time will be. Happy birthday dear. God bless and indeed you will exceed your dreams. N/b nice pieces of advice, seem simple but true.

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 12, 2017 at 11:58 am

      Thanks Eno. Really appreciate it. Oh my daughter would be told these stories from grade 1 so she can ‘have sense’.lol

  • Reply
    francisca
    July 11, 2017 at 7:51 pm

    hmmm i couldn’t stop giggling oh and do also tell ur 18 yr old self thst the first boy you date in the university isnt the one. lol happy birthday darling and dabby sure is a replica kai

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 12, 2017 at 11:59 am

      To think every girl thinks their first boyfriend is their husband, then Sweet Valley high novels were just messing up our brains.lol

  • Reply
    Chizo
    July 11, 2017 at 9:29 pm

    Another fantastic read from one gorgeous girl. Have an amazing day 🎉🎊

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 12, 2017 at 12:00 pm

      Thanks darling Chizo. You too

  • Reply
    Precious @ Precious Core
    July 17, 2017 at 5:19 pm

    Hahaha this was such a fun read, Bubu! You are such a good writer. Please don’t stop writing. Lol at Keto and Ghetto! Haha the thing you said about modern day mad people.
    Here’s me wishing you a very happy belated birthday. Stay gorgeous dear.

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 17, 2017 at 9:10 pm

      Awwww. Thanks dear. This means a lot. Funny enough, I thought of you first thing today and here you are. XO

  • Reply
    Amaka
    July 28, 2017 at 4:15 am

    Lol. Such a lovely post. Happy belated birthday, Bubu. 🙂

    amakamedia.com

    • Reply
      Bubu
      July 30, 2017 at 11:17 am

      Thanks Akaka. Great to have you here

  • Reply
    Live In Ibadan
    August 10, 2017 at 9:45 am

    Wow! This is the most honest letter to my younger self I’ve read and it’s pretty funny and real! Happy Birthday and this is my first time here. I saw your link on kacheetee’s blog and I’m so bookmarking your blog. You’re still very beautiful, you know.

    http://www.liveinibadan.blogspot.com

    • Reply
      Bubu
      August 10, 2017 at 6:16 pm

      Awwww. Thanks. I really appreciate your visit and comment.

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